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Letting Life Back In
“Sometimes creating a new life isn't about changing everything. It's about making room to experience more of the life that's already here.”
I've been thinking recently about letting life back in and what that actually means for me.
Not just getting back on track.
Not just having more energy or feeling better.
But actually enjoying being part of life again.
And I think there is a difference.
Over the last few months, I've spent a lot of time thinking, reflecting, learning and trying to work things out.
Some of that has been necessary. Some of it has been uncomfortable. And some of it has helped me see things about myself that I hadn't recognised before.
But something else has been happening too.
I've been reminded that life isn't only about understanding ourselves, overcoming difficulties or working towards the next version of who we want to become.
There is a life to be lived along the way.
When life becomes something to manage
I wonder how many of us reach midlife having become very good at managing life, but perhaps not quite as good at enjoying it.
We manage our responsibilities.
Our finances.
Our work.
Our homes.
Our relationships.
Our health.
And when something isn't working, we try to fix it.
We look for answers. We learn new things. We make plans. We try harder.
There is nothing necessarily wrong with any of that.
But I wonder whether, somewhere along the way, life can become another project to manage.
Something we are continually trying to improve rather than something we are allowing ourselves to experience.
And perhaps that is worth noticing.
Remembering what feels good
This weekend, I spent time walking part of the Bibbulmun Track with John and a few others.
Being outdoors, surrounded by nature, sharing the experience with other people and simply enjoying the time together.
It was a reminder of something I think I had been missing.
Not another achievement.
Not another task ticked off a list.
Just the pleasure of being out in the world, doing something different and spending time with people whose company I enjoy.
And I think that matters.
Because when we've spent a long time dealing with responsibilities, challenges or simply trying to keep everything moving, it can become easy to forget that life has another side to it.
The side that involves laughter.
Fresh air.
Shared experiences.
Doing things because we want to, rather than because we have to.
Nothing particularly extraordinary.
But perhaps that's the point.
I don't need every experience to teach me something.
I don't need every conversation to lead to a breakthrough.
I don't need every day to be productive.
Sometimes it is enough to enjoy where I am and who I am with.
Letting life back in
For me, letting life back in is about making room.
Room for enjoyment.
Room for connection.
Room for spontaneity.
Room for things that don't necessarily have a purpose beyond the pleasure of experiencing them.
It is also about recognising that I have choices.
I can choose to spend time with people who matter to me.
I can choose to make plans that excite me.
I can choose to do something simply because I enjoy it.
And I can choose not to fill every available moment with another task.
That might sound obvious.
But I don't think it always is.
Especially when we've spent years measuring our days by what we've achieved or how much we've managed to get done.
Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that enjoyment doesn't have to be earned.
There is more ahead
Something else I've been noticing is how good it feels to have things to look forward to.
In just over a week, I'll be heading to England and Spain to spend time with family and celebrate my Mum's 80th birthday.
And I'm looking forward to it.
Not because I'm trying to escape the life I have now.
But because there are people I want to spend time with, places I want to visit and experiences I want to have.
There are memories to make.
Conversations to have.
Moments to be present for.
And perhaps that's part of letting life back in.
Recognising that the future doesn't have to be another problem to solve.
It can also be something to look forward to.
I don't want to spend so much time preparing for the life I want that I forget to enjoy the life I'm living.
What I am learning
I am realising that personal growth doesn't always have to feel like hard work.
Sometimes it looks like recognising a pattern.
Sometimes it means making a difficult choice.
And sometimes it is as simple as saying yes to something that makes us smile.
We don't have to wait until everything is sorted.
Until we're completely confident.
Until we've worked through every old belief or figured out exactly what comes next.
We can start enjoying life while we're still finding our way.
And perhaps that is something worth remembering.
A new life isn't only something we work towards. It's something we can begin to experience along the way.
Ponder
Where in your life have you become so focused on managing things that you've forgotten to make room for enjoyment?
And what is one thing you could say yes to, simply because it would make life feel a little more like yours?
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